SOLO DRIVEN ADVENTURE HUNGRY – Eastern America Tour – Part 1
A girl, her truck and their adventures © Monaya MaGaurn 2021
Don’t travel with your boyfriend…
Unless he’s a landrover Defender.
![SARGE AND ME: Eastern Tour 2021 – Part 1 – Michican to Toronto SARGE AND ME: Eastern Tour 2021 – Part 1 – Michican to Toronto](https://i0.wp.com/monayamae.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Photo-Nov-01-11-13-04-AM-2.jpg?w=1165)
Knock, Knock, Anyone ready to go on tour?
“LAYYYYYYLA, you’ve got me on my knees, Layla, I’m begging, darling, please…” echoed through the garage while I finished stuffing Sarge and Me totes one after another in the back of the truck. When my phone started cutting the music out with text notifications, “Tell me something good,” the clip I had assigned for text years ago, repeated again and again. I was about to start the panic cycle right when mom opened the side door, “Knock, knock, anyone here, anyone ready to go on tour?” I left that morning knowing my alignment was a bit off, there was no lock on my backdoor with all my gear, and I would probably go over budget for my trip. That was what I thought would be my hang-up.
“Experience is your best friend”
I know the way to Seattle, San Francisco, and Los Angeles without using a map.
I can count the number of times on one hand that I have looked at a compass pointing East on a road trip. It was always on the return, too – never the beginning. I never even thought about going Eastward. After making one last stop in Minnesota to my home shop, Bishop and Rook, I set out, finally going Eastward toward St. Paul. When I stopped at my favorite Thai restaurant to pick up dinner, it was only natural that I got lost on the East side of the Mississippi River on my way out of town. I’m going to blame it on my hanger. When I did get my Thai food I inhaled spicy Panang Curry and potstickers in a very uneventful mall parking lot. That’s one thing they don’t talk about on Instagram – mall parking lots. They would become where you eat your food, where you meet your friends, and where you think.
Not every memory of your trip will be picturesque ocean views, wildlife moments, the smell of rain in a 100-year-old forest, or an alpine glow. I consider myself lucky to have experienced these moments before I ever even sat in a Defender. But what I encountered with Sarge, just Sarge, not even the others I came into contact with, would be just as strong of a memory.
![SARGE AND ME: Eastern Tour 2021 – Part 1 – Michican to Toronto SARGE AND ME: Eastern Tour 2021 – Part 1 – Michican to Toronto](https://i0.wp.com/monayamae.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Screen-Shot-2022-04-15-at-11.43.12-AM.png?resize=1165%2C603)
Traveling across Wisconsin was like eating white cake with American buttercream.
It was easy, but I had had way more than enough by the time I crossed the Michigan border. I passed the “Welcome to Michigan” sign, and a disco party of lights pulled out behind me.
Officer: “Excuse me, Ma’am. Do you know why I pulled you over tonight?”
S&M: “Sir, I picture I am going too slow. Do you need me to turn on my hazards?”
Officer: “No, I pulled you over because you have no lights on the back end of your truck.”
S&M: “None?”
Officer: “Yes. Ma’am, None”
S&M : “Darkwad”
The officer was about my age and seemed incredibly concerned that I was out driving this truck across America after dark. I opened the door and walked with the officer to the back of the truck. Lo and behold – dark as night. I began to check the fuses and connections to the lights. Everything seemed fine but still no lights.
Officer: “Let’s try your hazards.”
S&M: “Blinkies?”
Officer : “We have light.”
S&M: “And you are okay with me driving across Michigan like this? I have to get to at least Iron Mountain tonight.”
Officer: “Iron Mountain?! That’s four hours from here. Tonight?!”
S & M: “It’s that, or I go to Sault St Marie.”
Officer: “You better get going.”
S& M: “Thank you, sir.”
Officer: “Good luck. I’ll be watching your channel.”
Big Huge Flakes Dancing
Climbing into the driver’s seat, freezing cold, beginning to feel fatigued, I turned on the speaker. I had been waiting, for hours, saving the entire charge on the Bluetooth PA speaker for when I got tired. It was a seven-hour charge, and I knew I had a four-hour drive. Either way, I had food, a bed, and a diesel heater. I was set. It started to drop huge beautiful flakes.
Iron Mountain is known for its snow, so when it dropped on me early in the season, I considered it a blessing. When I woke up the next morning, and it had all melted off, snow-loving Monaya was mildly heartbroken. But again, I had no idea what would be in store for me. I stopped at a local gas station that had a repair shop. Before I could ask if they had an alignment machine, the guy was damn near climbing up into Sarge. So many questions, like always. I remembered when I would see a Defender in the middle of nowhere and just get so happy someone was out there getting it done. I answered each and everyone and was ready to get on the road by the time I finished pumping gas. I didn’t even ask about the alignment machine.
![Icing frosting texture background close-up American Buttercream Icing frosting texture background close-up](https://i0.wp.com/mynameismonaya.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/American-Buttercream-scaled.jpeg?resize=1165%2C777&ssl=1)
How ’bout them Rock Knockers?
Pointing north, seeking a lake view, I started driving to Marquette, Michigan. The weather was perfect, sunny with blue skies and fall colors. It’s a two-and-a-half-hour drive on a two-lane through the forest. I was pretty stoked when I spotted something parked that looked like a purple Chevy Bel Air with a snowplow on it. I pulled in to get a better look, finding all sorts of ridiculous spectacles. Welcome to the “Da Yoopers”. There was more to look at than a passerby could see. But, what piqued my interest was a rock shop called “Rock Knockers.” I had just come from Iron Mountain so it was no surprise when I walked in and saw all sorts of weird iron formations. But What was of particular interest was a wood stove in the corner with Mother of Pearl inlays. It was huge. The clerk explained that they did use it for heat in the winter and that the areas with mother of pearl would show the flames inside. It was beautiful. At that point – I reveled in how many beautiful things we see in a lifetime but never take home. What a splendor to see someone else’s shiny object, admire it and leave without it. I purchased three nautilus fossils and asked where the nearest pasty was. I was starving.
Hot midwestern food is one of those things that instantly makes me feel at home, you know? Meat and potatoes, gravy-type things, etc. My affection goes to chicken pot pie. I noticed the wind picking up and tried to finish my lunch as fast as possible to get back on the road. I could smell the snow in the air and knew I would go up and down in elevation. It wasn’t forty-five minutes before the snow started to pile up, and it was slushy. I wanted to stay by the lake as the views were stunning. After pushing Sarge about a quarter of a mile up a very steep climb, sliding all over the place, I remembered what I learned in Tahoe; There will always snow more by the lake. I had to let my plan go of traveling the entire shore to Sault St Marie. I cut south and started back due East. This turn in direction led to more two-lane – this time, with 4 inches of ice-slop snow that was getting firm. It was like driving down a snowy trail, going up and down hills in ruts for hours. I played push-pull for nearly five hours when it should have been a two-hour drive, arriving in Sault Ste Marie around 11 pm.
Sarge told me to park between the two gold Range Rovers at the Holiday Inn Express. “Don’t worry about me here. I’ll see you in the morning.” I nodded, looking back at him, “Pretend to beep your key fob?” The woman at the front desk was more than pleasant, again with about a hundred questions. She handed me a flyer with all the restaurants in Sault St Marie, both American and Canadian. I had clementines for dinner and passed out.
The warmth that permeated the bathroom from the heat lamp felt like grandma’s hug. After staying in one too many Holiday Inn Express, you notice the subtle nuances between one town to the next. I obviously noticed there was a heat lamp in the bathroom, something I thought the brand had removed from their rooms due to fire hazard. I gathred the necessary items and began a childhood ritual. Two bath towels arranged on the bathroom floor under direct heat of the lamp, and set a book on the counter. After I took a shower, I sat on that floor, reading my book, eating more clementines for at least an hour. Only this time, when the light snapped off on the timer, I was older and teared up because this generation would never know the common comfort of one hotel to the next’s habitual sit under a heat lamp and read a book in a bathroom. I understand why hotels update. Lots of butts on toilets is an unslightly thought. I was grateful for this hotel and its non-percapita reaching butt count.
![The Sault Ste. Marie International Bridge as seen from Whitefish Island The Sault Ste. Marie International Bridge as seen from Whitefish Island](https://i0.wp.com/mynameismonaya.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/sault-ste-marie-bridge2-scaled.jpeg?resize=1165%2C777&ssl=1)
On the other side of the bridge: candada
I have this recurring nightmare. I have no idea what it means. But, I start somewhere lovely, windows down, driving along, always alone. I can see a long landscape in front of me, and it’s beautiful. Its cliffs, bluffs, or a long uninterrupted view, only to be cut off by a bridge. The bridges in my dreams are massive, similar to The Golden Gate bridge. In my dream, there are no cars on the bridge. I begin to cross. Suddenly the bridge becomes icy, and the vehicle starts to slide. I try to turn out of a spin, swerve, hit a guardrail, and go off the edge of the bridge. While in the air, plunging downward, I see the water getting closer and closer until BAM. The front end of the car hits the water. The windshield is suddenly covered in water, not the kind that slides off. The kind that you look through, not at. As soon as I see it pour into the footwell, a window begins to crack and eventually shatters once the entire car is submerged. Swimming with my eyes open toward any light, watching the car plummet behind me. I have had this dream set in the dead of night, amid a summer morning, on a fall day where it’s snowing, and many other scenes. I always find my way to the top of the water and drag myself onto the shore.
I didn’t have this dream that night. But, standing in front of the coffee shop downtown, cortado in hands, the same feeling washed over me as my eyes moved across the skyline, looking at the bridge to go across the river to Canada. It felt like an hour and a half to get across that bridge, doing 25 miles an hour, sliding around on the ice. “Don’t die. Go slow, don’t die. Not today Mr. Bridge.” I made it to the other side in record slow time and pulled out my crispy passport with covid credentials tucked inside. The woman in the small kiosk handed the book back to me and said, “Enjoy Canada, we are going to enjoy you.” I smiled and drove through the gates right into a Tim Horton’s parking lot for more coffee.
Upon biting into a donut, my iPhone zapped me in the ass with a notification. “You are now on roaming data, you have used 5 free gigs of data and all additional data will be $15 per gig.”
Okay, so it will be fine, just don’t use Insta and Spotify. And then the GPS map wouldn’t update. You don’t really know how reliant on data you are until you don’t have any. I pulled over in a small town and got on the phone with Verizon. The first thing he said was “Are you near a McDonald’s?” I already knew what he was talking about and started the truck to drive a block over for some free wi-fi. While this kid at the other end of the call was trying to find me phone service of some sort, he would ask me questions about Instagram and Facebook marketing strategies. The call ended with me giving him a link to my website and him telling me that I would have to poach wi-fi wherever I went. I would later find out this call would cost me $48. I downloaded a map to Barrie, Ontario, and took off, thinking I could find a Tim Horton’s there to find some more wi-fi.
![SARGE AND ME: Eastern Tour 2021 – Part 1 – Michican to Toronto SARGE AND ME: Eastern Tour 2021 – Part 1 – Michican to Toronto](https://i0.wp.com/monayamae.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Screen-Shot-2022-04-15-at-11.50.50-AM.png?resize=1165%2C598)
This map would later shit out again and I would watch that compass stare back at me.
“East! East, you fool!” It silently shouted at me. I reached Sudbury and, do you know what they have in Sudbury? Starbucks. I stopped for a brown sugar shaken espresso and some more free wi-fi. Downloading the map again, this time saving the zoomed-out version as a PDF. This was the point where I allowed my mind to go back on autopilot, admiring the scenery that had changed to bluffs, grass, and trees. It reminded me of Minnesota next to Lake Superior.
“East you fool, East!”
![The wanderer twisted willow dream catcher dream catcher with twisted branches for support](https://i0.wp.com/mynameismonaya.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Screen-Shot-2022-04-13-at-7.19.21-PM.png?resize=918%2C1338&ssl=1)
Full tank of Diesel
My brother told me that I always had to fill up if the area was new to me or I was going into the mountains. I had three-quarters of a tank, but something about this gas station was weird as hell and well, I didn’t know where I was either. Time to fill up!!! The station said “Trading Post”, which in my book, are magic words. As I approached the pumps, a native man approached me for my card. I was confused and looked at him sideways, “My credit card, sir?”
“Yes, Ma’am, this is full service.” He said. “All the way out here?” My eyebrows must have gone up while I said it. Inside the gas cap of a Defender is a funnel that comes out on a chain to fill with jerry cans. He pulled the entirety of it out. Holding it up by the gas cap on the chain, he stated, “Wow, I’m impressed by this doohicky. What does it do?” I quickly explained and then the questions just started to pour out of him. With the final question, “Ma’am, you seem fully capable. You said you were not in the military, but do you carry?”, I made a reply which was every bit as ambiguous as I could make it. “Do you need supplies? There is lunch up there at the trading post. Would you drive up there and show my friends your truck?”
I drove up a small muddy hill with some leftover snow and pulled the e-brake. It began. Human after human came out the door of the small store onto a large porch with tables and chairs. I opened the door of the truck, my leg holding it open while I gathered purse crap. “Y’all got coffee?!” I exclaimed and jumped down. Nine humans sat down on that porch while I poked around inside. They had all your typical tourist stuff – fun stuff for kids such as bizarre candy, etc. I picked up a snake of Zots, my favorite candy that my brother would bring home from Norwegian camp. Looking at everything, walking through the tiny isles until I looked up, I stopped dead in my tracks, staring at the ceiling. Immediately, tears filled my eyes and I began to sob. Looking up, all I could see were dream catchers made of twisted willow branches. This would mean nothing to most people. You might walk by and say, “Wow… that looks interesting,” and move on. Me, I couldn’t keep myself together. I grew up with a Native American reservation on all sides of town – four different tribes, politics, and traditions. Growing up, my experience with Native Americans being very prevalent in my community helped me understand other minority populations. I am honored to come from where I do. A woman noticed the tears and came over with a huge stick. She took one down from the ceiling and put it in my hands. “I need to take this with me, is that okay?” I asked her. She started to laugh, “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Almost ten years to the day, I set out on a cross-country road trip with the man I thought I would marry. We drove from Boston Massachusetts to Lake Tahoe, California in a BMW E36 (330i) over seven days. We stopped at a trading post somewhere in the middle of Oklahoma. He wanted a Pendelton blanket, I wanted something random. We chose that particular trading post out of many because it had a llama farm. I told him I wanted a llama. “I’ll bring the truck and a trailer next time, Monaya. Let’s just find something interesting.” I had an arrowhead in my hand on my walk to the register, until my eyes led up to the gables. There it was, this massive dream catcher that was twisted and gnarled with all sorts of interesting feathers and beads on it. “What is that?” I asked.
“That is the Wanderer.” The woman looked up from the register. I looked at Mike and asked, “Can we take that with us?” He replied, “I’m not sure if it will fit in the car, but I guess we will ship it.” This was the man who introduced me to Defenders. He and that dream catcher will remain close to my heart until I die. Now, here I was, standing with a smaller version in my hands, all alone, doing the same thing. The universe has an uncanny way of telling me, you are exactly where you are supposed to be. Keep going.
![MONAYAMAEMAGAURN_SARGEANDME_PFAFFTUNING MONAYAMAEMAGAURN_SARGEANDME_PFAFFTUNING](https://i0.wp.com/mynameismonaya.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/37BACE30-76BE-41E7-96CA-494485865237.jpg?resize=1165%2C2071&ssl=1)
Sarge and Me
Sarge and Me is a project years in the making with Monaya’s first Defender experience in 2010. Later teaming up with Bishop and Rook in 2018. A celebration of legacy, independence, and eccentricity, Sarge and Me is going on the road. Follow along @mynameismonaya